Destined to almost host
Tonight it was my destiny to almost host two shows. First off I was promised a set on the Laugh’s Unlimited showcase, which always means that I show up and my heart breaks because I can’t actually get the set for whatever reason. I knew it would happen tonight of course, and it did, but even though I expected it my heart still broke. Maybe if I go for a run it will heal. So anyway, my friend Carlos asked if I wanted to host his show tonight, but I couldn’t because of the phantom set at Laugh’s Unlimited. So then at Laugh’s the announcer for opening the show calls me over, and then announces the show with me as the host. That was a surprise since I didn’t even think they were going to let me on. So, I went up there and talked about how surprised I was and got ready to start the show. I didn’t know who I would be bringing on as the first comic or anything, but I didn’t care. But then the guy that was supposed to be running it came up so I was like, okay whatever. So I almost got to host, and I almost got to do a set, but, I didn’t get to. I don’t get why they do that to me every time, but they do, and there’s nothing I can do about it, so I just keep trying anyway.
Actually, I probably could have gotten on, but the people who said they were gonna come see me didn’t show up. It happens. Tomorrow might be awkward at work. They’ll ask me how it went, and I’ll have to say I didn’t get on because no one came. So I just left since I knew I wasn’t getting on, and then I went to Carlos’ room and did a set there. It was pretty cool. They had a table top microphone that kept cutting out unless you held it by the base only, which is what I did. I think my set went well too and I saw some friends so it was a good time.
Last night I went to Po Boyz and Boxing Donkey. It was the first time I went to Po Boyz since Cheryl stopped running it and handed it to Ben Rice. We had to turn the mic level to the max since people were talking, but it was okay. My set started slow because a few people in the crowd thought they were hot shit and tried saying stuff to throw me off. But it didn’t work, and they didn’t know what to do. I didn’t even have to use any heckling techniques. Then after a few choice jokes they were hooked so I did like 30 minutes since there weren’t any more comics.
At the Donkey people do long sets so I had to wait a while, but I’m pretty patient. I knew I would probably do good when I walked in and this pretty blonde girl got excited because she’d seen me do the Centipede joke before. I like brunettes but blondes, I’m open to blondes, especially if they can appreciate the centipede joke. Maybe she wouldn’t be grossed out by my hairy back then. Shallow whores… Anyway, my set did go well and I had a blast. I’m back.